Ninja Jae’s blog

How do you act as if you're happy even when  you aren't.  I know it's possible, I do it a lot because I'm not really happy at all with my life or my situation. I'm a god damn fat fucking hog that can't find a new job, can't seem to find someone that loves her and will marry her and wants to have kids with her.  Sometimes I feel like a god damn sex object only I'm not sure how as previously noted.  All anyone wants from me is sex or so it seems.  Anyway I'm the loser of the family I'm 33 and I don't make very good money I live alone but I'm not really doing too well my car payment is almost always late my rent is behind, thank god my landlord is understanding.  I just got news today from my younger sister that she is pregnant and she isn't even happy about it.  yeah this isn't a pity blog just a blog to vent my feelings atm.  my YOUNGEST sister is married and has been for a few years and now she is getting ready to have kids my older sister is married and has kids and now my next younger is living with a bf and they are having a baby. WTF am I all alone.  I think I'm a good person and I really think someone would be lucky to have me as a girlfriend or wife.  so why can't I get someone like that, why can't I have a baby.  You know I'm running out of time I'm not getting any younger fjdklsjfkl;sajkfl; ugh I hate this I hate my life the only good thing about it is my dog and he'd be okay without me.  he'd probably be better off I mean as much as I spoil him he would still probably be better in someone else's care.  His shots are out of date right now and I tried to fix that but the vet for some reason doesn't think he needs them until Sept.  Fine I know that's not true but if I can save a few pennies here then I'll have the couple hundred in Sept to take him back and not be put out for spending it. I don't know I hate to sound so whiny but it's how I feel right now, I'm not happy she's pregnant and ugh. I hate my life.

so yeah this week will be far a few between on my visits to the internet.  I'm having a week visitor.  I'm so excited! anywayyeahmyeariskillingme and that is about all I have atm. bye.

I love that song I'm pretty sing songy lately and that's a good thing cause it pretty much means i've been in great moods.  So I didn't get the job at the bank due to my effed up credit, I wish I could clean that up with a magic wand but alas I can't if you'd like to donate to my cause feel free to pay pal me @ delilahjayne@hotmail.com that would be fantastic lol anyway I've decided since the system is going to fuck me, I'm going to fuck the system.  I'm starting my own business, I wrote the plan now I just have to apply for my number and make sure noone else is using the name of the company I'm making.  It's going to be an events planner, parties, fund raisers what have you the name is Open Invitation, so if you need a planner give me a call I'll be sure to help out!

The take this as you will post wasn't for my regular readers that was for a special guest reader heh.

So yeah work is so ohhhh my gosh lately I got in a fight with an agent today that wouldn't take a freaking call because she was eating?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?! What the fuck is that shit? I was like you WILL and she was Like I won't and I finally said LISA is being a brat, I'll take care of it. lol she was like no I'm not and I don't talk when I'm eating and I said oh lisa I love you but sometimes I hate you and she was like that's fine lol

Okay so I wasn't in a park today but it was a nice saturday, brunch at my mom's for my grandmother's 90th birthday Happy Birthday Nana and for Father's Day, Happy Father's day dad (I got him steelers tickets, well I got he and I steelers tickets lol) Anywho I spent the most part of the day playing with my gorgeous and hysterical neice and  a little with my nephew he isn't play ready yet but he's great!  Everyone left my mom's and my mom decided she was going to buy a new sewing machine because her old one broke, while we were there I was like I'm going to get one some day and my mom was all like do you want one? I'll buy you one if you want one, so I got my very first sewing machine, god I'm excited I bought some samples to practice and play with it, unfortunately I need to set it up closer to an outlet because where I was going to is too far away from one so I didn't get to play with it yet but tomorrow I will.  after realizing this I started cleaning like a mad woman cause my place really needs it I didn't do much in the way o f cleaning this past week and I don't understand how it got so dirty while I was away but it did lol so yeah the cleaning will be finished tomorrow so yeah that was my day and I'm excited about tomorrow to get my cleaning done and then play with my sewing machine at least not just jumping into it, I had to read the instructions and now I know how to at least  use it, or so I think we shall see tomorrow!

Ha I have that song stuck in my head and it's okay cause I like the song =] So yeah I have to get my butt in gear reorder my transcripts from HACC to go to Duquesne so I can sign up for fall courses there.  I can't believe I finished school and now I'm going on.  I like going to school it does take up a lot of my free time, but that's okay I can deal with that I'll be happier in the end.  I don't know if I typed this before, but I recently applied for a job as an assistant branch manager at this new bank they are opening in walmarts, I have the phone interview tonight I think it will go well as long as I can keep dragan cool calm and collected, he has a tendacy to act out when I'm on the phone.  I'll probably just give him a kong with peanut butter in it that way he'll be focused on that and won't be paying attention to me at all heh.  Saturday I'm taking the neice to Tobias' animal farm I remember loving it as a kid I'm sure she will too.  I'm still tossing this moving to Charlotte thing around, the southside of Charlotte is great!  I loved it there last week but then I'd be so far away from family and that is what is holding me back I'll miss so much if I move there and I know my sister will come to visit me and stuff and I can always fly home but I need a good enough job to pay for plane tickets like once a month and a good kennel cause sorry Dre you ain't flying,  you can ride but you can't fly ha.  well I think that's about all I have no real amazing thoughts or ideas just me talking about me and my life so until next time..

Edits for the day I just got off the phone for my interview with the bank, I totally rocked that thing and it was short but she said she will be calling me back shortly she was highly impressed with my interview.  DAMN I am excited!

Here it is the football talk group, please feel free to discuss anything football or football related ie players, coaches, you know the deal.  Feel free to post articles or questions or whatever you want!  Rudeness towards others will not be tolerated and no pornography.  You can swear but please be aware there maybe younger kids reading this as well so don't put your foot in your own dag gone mouth.  Oh yeah one last rule, think  then type.  

Or so I thought lol

Kelly my co-worker comes back today! She was on maternity leave, it'll be great  having her back and I have a lot of work removed from me. =]  I had to yell at my stressing out boss yesterday.  He was talking about the bin (which is kelly's work) That another agent and I have been working on to make sure it got done of course while she was off work but yesterday I just let it sit because I was like she's coming back and I don't want her to be bombarded but I'm bombarded so I am not doing it   I said CAN'T IT WAIT TILL TOMORROW and he finally goes, oh okay I'm sure he's still catching flack for not doing what the big boss would do but he's not the big boss so whatever.  Friday evening I have a phone interview for a bank they are putting in Wal mart and I can hardly wait.

So last week was my return to a city I know and love all too well.  I haven't been there since 2004 when I tried to move there and man it was a bust.  ha.  so yeah I was on vacation last week with my friend and her family her husband was in this airbrush seminar and we got to meet craig frasier, nice guy  anyway we were in Charlotte NC it was great and now I remember why I wanted to move there before and I'm totally contemplating moving there again.  If I could only talk the boyfriend into moving there with me he doesn't think he would like it there but I'm betting he would! anyway that's all I have for now hasta

Or it's THE secret,  most of you Oprah watchers have heard of this I'm sure, I didn't get it from her though my mom bought me the book and man has it done wonders for me.  I've grown after reading this, I'm looking at things differently and I'm happy about my life I'm positive.  Somehow though I need to change the money aspect to positive, I'm going on Vacation Tuesday and I don't have but 5.00 to my name because the fucking bank is holding my payroll check until friday because it wasn't a god damn local check so they held it for two weeks, what the fucking kind of shit is this? anyway if you know anywhere I can get a few hundred bucks until friday please let me know.